Tag Archives: parenting

Wrangling Time & Making Music

One of the challenges we bloggers face is time, if you stick at it for any length of time, there will come a period when having enough time to write your blog become sparse. That goes for any form of creative expression, unless you are fortunate enough to do it professionally. I have been through one of those seasons recently but fortunately have managed to maintain enough creativity & will to continue to create to at least bring you some poetry fairly regularly. I think that is the key to getting through these seasons, intentionally keeping your desire to create at the forefront of your mind. Then, even if it is not as often as you would like, or the lengthy deep thinking post you were hoping to write, you will still find enough time a few times a week to create something, at least that is how it works for me. This life is amazing when you take the time to look around, inspiration is everywhere, from a warm cup of coffee to a cold rain drop, beauty & creative inspiration is just waiting for you to cease it.

What has been keeping me busy this time? I’m glad you asked J early in the summer my beloved daughter asked me if she could play soccer this fall.  Overjoyed I said yes, this is something I had been hoping for since she was born, but consciously had not pushed the game on her. I wanted her to find her own love for the game, if she were even to like it at all, the last thing I wanted was to be the Dad forcing his kid to play the game he loved. So, to cut a long story short, she is playing soccer now & I am coaching her team. We practice 2 nights a week, those days I don’t take a lunch break to make sure I can leave early enough to get there, then they play their games on a Saturday. To add to that, the itch to put my boots back on has become too strong and so for the first time in 7 years I too am playing soccer, practicing once a week & playing once a week. So, while it is for a good & very enjoyable reason, writing more than a few poems has not been possible recently & will probably remain a struggle until mid-November.

Now for all the Brits who might be upset as me calling the beautiful game soccer, don’t fret, my adopted country has not got to me quite that badly yet 😉 I use the name for ease of translation, but also I know & understand it’s origins. You see, the word soccer does not come from people who refuse to call anything other than the NFL football. Back in England during the mid-1800s when rules were being set for the various codes of football, the 2 most notable games that came out of that were Association Football & Rugby Football. In order to differentiate between these 2 new and popular codes, the terms Soccer taken from AsSOCiation and Rugger from Rugby were coined. Rugby of course down the road split again into Union & League – the proper version 😉 So, now when someone asks you about soccer, you can be assured that it is actually a piece of Victorian English slang & not an offensive American misnomer.

Another down side of being so beautifully busy is that after trying to call myself out to get back into recording music, I have barely had time to do anything with it. Although I did acquire a new acoustic guitar, a PRS (SE) Angelus, which is a beauty of an instrument, I should write a review on it or something soon. I took a couple of vacation days at the start of last week, to rest & unwind, the plan was also to use them to record some music. I made a start, but not much progress, the first day I did nothing, the 2nd day I recorded a scratch track for the next song I will be recording & started to work on the drums. Unfortunately I appear to have never considered how the drums should sound for the track. Between trying to get the tempo right & finding at least a foundation midi file to me to mold I lost a bunch of time & got a headache. Still, it is a beginning & my goal is to have it done by the end of the year. Not exactly a tight deadline, but it is at least realistic! This will be the first song I record with Cubase 7.5, I recently took advantage of a significant sale & upgraded from Cubase Essentials 5 to the full & newest version. The initial impressions are very favorable & I am looking forward to really getting to know it.

Today I had the privilege of leading worship at Solomon’s Porch the weekly homeless ministry put on by  The Lords Hands & Hearts. I didn’t get to do it in September due to my coaching commitments so it was a real pleasure to be there today. I actually met a volunteer there who is a music producer & he invited me to go to his studio sometime to see what we could create together, which I found very exciting (& slightly scary). Unfortunately with everything else that was going on there on the day we forgot to exchange info, still, it was a nice boost that someone like that had good things to say about me. I am sure I’ll see him again soon, I should probably start writing some music, or putting some of these poems I keep writing together into songs, that was always the plan anyway.

So there you have it, I’ve been busy but in a good way, life is going swimmingly & for the first time, maybe ever, I feel like an effective time wrangler, not someone holding onto a piece of driftwood on the ocean of time. It’s almost like the peace of God has filled me up & despite all of the “me” that tries to get in the way, His love and supernatural joy make me realize that “it is well with my soul”.

Be blessed my friends & make time to create, what you have to day. No matter how brief is beautiful and important.

Here’s a video of the aforementioned song that I am working on. I did it in a hurry for you so please excuse the clipping. I wrote this at the beginning of the year. The song is supposed to prompt the listener to ask them self the question of where do you turn when  things are going wrong. I believe having a good answer to this question is the key to a happy life. For me it is Jesus, what is it for you?

The idea for the final sound is to be fairly folksy but more Americana than full on Mumford & Sons. The initial idea for the song came to me while listening to Breathe Me In by Jared & the Mill. I was driving in the car with my family at the time & had that annoying thing of having to try & remember what had just happened in my mind until I got home. Next time I’ll just have my wife write the lyrics down or something lol. I have really been enjoying the recent resurgence in acoustic folk / blue grass type music. This was my attempt to write in that style, I feel that lyrically it is one of the best songs that I have produced.

Here is the Jared & the Mill song for you to enjoy

Blood Moon

Solar eclipse
Blood moon
Must get up
Must remember to awake

A fathers promise, daddy’s duty
Sleep would have been nice though
The alarm would have done its job
Then the day would have been refreshing
Instead a dull tired ache accompanies my day

Yet it is oh so worth it
To see her marvel in the beauty
To share a moment
To witness firsts

Daddy’s privilege, my great honor
The great pleasure of loving life
The great gift of being loved

Parenting & Discipline

Being a parent can be so very rewarding

The free displays of love a child gives

The giggles, the smiles, the hugs

Watching your flesh and blood grow

It is such an amazing blessing

 

Yet there are those times when it is oh so difficult

When your teachings have failed

Or more so when broken human nature kicks in and overrides those teachings

You have to make a choice at that moment

A choice to be a parent, not just a friend, to be active and not passive

 

Then comes the quandary, finding the right balance

Deterrent, punishment, discipline

Yet how do you do that and still build up, not tear down your beloved child?

We are all so unique; what if what scarred you is exactly what they need?

What if you are causing the beginnings of brokenness?

 

Such great responsibility lies with being a good parent

Then you look around, you see what society says

Do this, don’t do that, don’t do that, do this

It was better when I was young they say, hit them, it didn’t hurt me

Yeah right,

 

That’s why our generation is the most self absorbed hedonistic therapy needing mess in history

Or at least that’s what they sell us, but are we really any worse than the ancient Greeks or the Romans or the medieval folks?

Maybe it’s just that we have innumerous 24 hour news stations and the internet over analyzing everything that anyone ever does

 

And then, in the midst of all this distraction, of all this guilt

You are reminded, that you were born to love

Love takes on many forms

When we love enough to discipline, we must also love enough to forgive

When we love enough to forgive, we must also love enough to explain

 

Sometimes, we must simply love enough to accept

That maybe our child is just that, a child,

Not the perfect flawless angel created in our minds

Yes, a child, that needs love and attention and nurturing

And discipline and guidance and enough room to make mistakes

And so much more, but mostly love

Broken male culture – part 3

Why won’t you be a Dad?

Does seeing your child alone not make you sad?

It certainly makes me sad

That you are afraid to be a Dad

 

There you are, lost in your drunk

Trying to hide from repetitive funk

Further down the slope you have sunk

To the outside looking like just another punk

 

Hidden meanings

Long lost feelings

Coping mechanisms

Hiding behind skepticisms

 

There nothing wrong, or so you say

Yet deep inside you hope for another way

Yet sometimes we must first hit rock bottom

Before we can begin to climb from Sodom

 

Another way is yours to find

Hopefully with some others of similar mind

There is always hope, so long as there is breath

The Way offers such hope, a cure for the age old curse called death

 

School run

As you exit the car

As you leave the protective cocoon

The place of safety that we keep you in

 

Where we can shelter you

Where we can guide you

Where we can mold you

 

When you leave our protection

You go into your own world

A world over which I have no control

 

With such little influence

I know that I will never know fully what happens in it

And I have to trust you

 

I have to trust God

That everything will be ok

So have a good day at school, my dear precious child

Happy Fathers Day

They say that over 60% of your identity comes from your father

Which leave the fatherless generation in quite the quandary

What if your father is not there, or no good?

Where does that leave your identity?

 

A bad father skews your image of God

A bad father will leave you believing lies about yourself for years to come

If you were taught wrong, turn from that

Choose to remember the good

Focus on what was done, not what was wrong

Now it is your turn, now you are the Dad

 

Responsibility – it is central to being a good Dad

Taking care of your family

Breathing life, truth & teaching into your children

You won’t be perfect, nobody is

You will mess up, you will miss things

But if the love is there, and the effort

Your child will know it, even if it takes a while to realize it

 

Grow truthful confidence in your kids, not arrogance, not lies

When your child asks life’s key questions

About her worth & value, if she is noticed,

You want her to know the answer, the truth, not a hells lie.

Build a home, not just a building

 

Home, it is acceptance, safety, love, a place to belong, a family.

It is never too late to make a change, or to get help

In the land of broken homes, be brave enough to be different,

Build a home, a family.

Send a healthy child out into the world.

Your story isn’t over

Happy Father’s Day

 

 

 

A big thank you to my Dad

Who always loved me & always did the best he could

Despite what life threw our way. Love you Dad!!